Teleporting Woes

Hey, have u reached?

Me, I’m still at home! I’m just KNEW something was gonna go wrong! And now I’ll be late!

I mean, when I got that new teleporter, I thought wow! This is cool! No more disorientation problems, no battery issues……..………….. and ALWAYS REACH IN TIME!!
And now this. I called the service center and the guy has the audacity to tell me that the warranty lasts only for the first 50 teleportations! Now it’ll take me a whole 10 nanoseconds longer. Even the arrival pads will be jammed at this hour!
I HATE the thought of spending SECONDS together without a body. And I hurt my arm when I fell off yesterday. Some kid landed a nanosecond too soon and knocked me over.

Apparently the new model T11235 gives an auto stability feature so you’re always standing straight when you land. I’m sure there are morons who’ll buy it too! I mean, why can’t you learn to land properly on your own? Guess it’s good for kids and senior citizens though. They should put some cushions instead, like planes had parachutes.

I’ll leave now. Grab a seat for me.
C ya!!